The Illuminati has bought the Redskins! They are very excited to become closer to the agent RG3. Dave Smith, a well known Illuminati ally, released a statement that his company, the Whiteboy Cheesecakes, had bought the Washington Redskins, and are planning to rename the team the Washington NOVUS ORDO SECLORUMS, and they are going to force RG3 to change his name to Reggie Bacon-Bush. They also told him that if he doesn't step up his game, that he will be running a race down the unemployment line, and he will have to work at Burger King. They also announced that they would sell RG3 jerseys for 70% off because he is injured 70% of the time. Interview with Reggie Bacon-Bush coming soon.
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